Anjali !! A dedication
When I was a kid and I had my first tryst wid life , it whispered somethin in my ear.. Now thats precisely what im going to share with you now..
I was riding my tricycle fitted with an auto horn in it that said "Pom Pom".. I rode it around the whole house , much to the irritation of my mom.. "Pisasu pisasu.. idhuku appa chellam kuduthu kuduthu keduthu vachirukkaaru", she screamed.. As she was cutting vegetables , I "Pomed" the horn again in her ear and rode away faster so that I was beyond her reach (She wouldnt get up and come and hit me.. duh i knew her so well).. It was evening time and it was time for my dad to come.. I rode the cycle in the sit out which had stairs that led to the garden in my house at hyderabad..
I was busy riding the cycle and didnt notice that one of the wheels was very loose.. It couldn withstand my abuse anymore and it broke .. PHAT !!! .. I rolled down the stairs and my head hit one of them.. My hand was bruised.. Just then my dad came into the house.. He has always loved me so much , so I expected him to carry me pamper me and all that.. But he jus came , gave me a hand , lifted me up and asked me to carry on playing.. Now this hurt me more than the fall !! "How can he do this ??? " I asked myself as I was seething in anger.. Now I didn wanna give up on this.. I cried louder than ever before "AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW" (I howled even before vadivelu started howling like this..) He asked me why im crying.. Now this angered me even more.. What does he mean why am I crying.. Cant he see Im hurt ??
I got really angry and stormed out with my tricycle "Pomming" inside the house again.. Now my mom was really surprised.. She gave my dad a very surprised look cause everybody knows Im appas chella kutty but how come he was so non chalant about the whole issue..
It took a long time for me to realise what parenting is !! Nobody can learn to cycle without bruising their knees.. He didnt want me to use crying as a means of sympathy and craving for attention.. If I had to learn to cycle , I had to do so independantly , fallin off my cycle , many a time.. The only thing he can do is to catch me when I fall and not console me when I cry.
"Careful ah ottu ma.. 3 rd gear liye ottu" , the man who I have always admired sat behind me , as I was learning to ride a bike.. "Ayyo indha ponnu endha kuzhi kulla nammala thalli vida poralo " , his inner mind must have said.. Yet, he sat there jus to let me do what I want to do.. "Pombala pulla pant chatta podaradhu , bike otradhu , idhellam nallave illa" mumbled my mother , as we reached home , after a 'road side pani poori gulp'.. I changed to my shorts and my dad and me started watching one of those late night movies together.. Wow I had made him bunk office again !!
I asked him "Appa oru ponnu na ippadi irukkanum nu solrangale .. what is that ippadi".. He hugged me closer and said..
"A woman should be bold , independant and strong.. A woman should command respect.. A woman should carry a mental alarm wid her... She should be able to draw the line between what is right and wrong.. Never gossip and never let gossip affect u.. She can be hated but must never give way to hating.. She must meet with triumph and disaster and treat those two imposters just the same.. She must hold on when there is nothing left in her , except for the will that asks her to hold on.. Neither foes nor loving friends must be able to hurt her.. Smile when you are hurt the most.. Cause its your fault if u re hurt.. U let urself be hurt. No one can hurt you without your consent.. If you are all of this You will be a woman my son !! "
The last lines haunted me "You will be a woman my son !!" . Every woman has a masculine touch in her and every man has a feminine touch in him.. Your friends depend on which touch is more in you..
"Ade de vanga vanga" he welcomed 14 of my frens who came home suddenly , without an announcement.. He entertained them with his wit and spoke to them as I would.. So much of youth in him though he is 54. . Salute u dad.. For letting me be the way I am.. I admire u so much
Even today most of my frens are close to him than they are to me.. Cause hes been an amazing friend and a companion.. Very recently when I came back for my vacation , I hugged him and told him "Thanks for loving me the way I am !! Im hurt Im upset because of so many things , still ill remember what you have always told me dad --
"Poyitu varen appa" , I said as I left for office today .. I felt I should write about this man who has always helped me when i was on the edge of a cliff ... He has either caught me whenever I fell or taught me how to fly !!